Article for the RAKSAFRICA magazine 2010

                                                        photograph by Marc Pradervand

Article

It started feeling really good when I could look into peoples faces, read their expressions, sense their reactions.
Before that, the nerves took over and a performance was something to ‘endure, something to get over with as quickly as possible, a flash of adrenalin that mixed everything into a frantic blur. Running on pure, raw, instinct.

For people who have been performing for a long time and who don't remember before the clarity, it may take them a while to remember now, how wonderful it was, the year, the day, the moment, when time seemed to be moving a fraction of its usual pace.
When each bone , each muscle, each sinew, stretched itself to its maximum, every single finger moving perfectly in sync. Every bend, twist or shake, perfectly and clearly anticipated and executed. All while enjoying the intimate exchange of energy between you and the audience.

I don't and won't , even for a moment , take the clarity for granted , because just as the quality of the experience is a hundred fold more exhilarating then before, it doesn't seem to be something that is always easy to grasp.

A dollop of exhausted body and mind,,
Not enough blood sweat and tears ,
A dash of cockiness
A pinch self importance
And we have a perfect recipe for…
BACK TO SQUARE ONE

Which is not where I want, or intend to be. (but… mind you…… have been, more times then Id like to admit).

With each new 4 minute experience , I have been given another chance to slip into that extreme world of exchange, clarity and controllable adrenalin.

 I have been given a chance to imprint deeply into somebody else's (and my own) memory, with all of my fears, my hang-ups, my endurance, my determination, my creativity, my energy, my passion, my fire, my self.

Rushka Johnson (SAreal performing arts company)